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We all want to make a relationship work–and ever better, for an entire lifetime! Sadly, the fact is that a lot of relationships don’t make it that far. You likely want to do everything you can to avoid having your partnership meet that fate!

Many strive to discover the secret to a happy relationship, and the answer is more complicated than just one be-all-end-all! Here’s how psychologists explain four things that make a relationship work.

1.    Positive Thinking Helps Make a Relationship Work

Positive thinking is a powerful thing, capable of completely changing your perception of any given situation. It’s also something you need to have if you want to keep a relationship healthy.

This has to be a mutual choice between both partners in the relationship, says Licensed Psychotherapist, author, and radio show host Barton Goldsmith. Both of you have to decide to control how you carry yourselves to promote more positive behavior and manage moods together as a team.

Here are some tips for developing positive thinking that can help make your relationship work:

·         Approach Problems With A Positive Mindset

When there’s a conflict or severe issue, pause and breathe before launching straight into combat mode. With positive motivation, problems are more likely to be solved through compromise and open-mindedness, says Monte Drenner, a licensed mental health counselor.

·         Share Positive Events In Your Life

When good things happen, seek out your partner and tell them about it. Numerous studies have found that sharing these positive points in your life – especially when you feel excited to tell your partner the great news – can facilitate a stronger bond.

·         Foster Good Self-Worth

Positive thinking applies to each partner, too. You must have healthy self-worth that isn’t attached to having a partner or how your partner makes you feel. If you rely too much on your partner for happiness, things will fall apart pretty quickly! You need to feel secure enough in yourself that other people’s opinions don’t damage your self-esteem, says School of Love NYC founder and dating coach Monika Parikh.

·         Reminisce On Times Of Laughter

Did you know that studies have shown that laughing together and then looking back on that laughter together is great for a relationship? Dr. Megan Stubbs, a relationship and intimacy expert, states that asking each other about your favorite happy memories together is a great way to begin reminiscing. The shared emotions and memories bring you together and can even make you think of the future to come.

2.    Communication Can Make a Relationship Work

There’s a reason that so many people say communication is the secret to a happy relationship. No human being can read minds, so you need to talk to your partner about different concerns you have or opinions you hold, says Goldsmith.

·         Share Your Downs

Being vulnerable can be scary, but it’s part of communication. Your partner can’t know how you feel if you don’t tell them. Licensed psychologist, Rapport Relationships founder, and dating coach, Dr. Jennifer B. Rhodes, even goes so far as to state that letting down your guard can be a huge part of intimacy as a whole.

·         Don’t Make Assumptions

No matter how well you believe, you know your partner, making assumptions is a surefire way to land yourself in confusing misunderstandings. Lasting Connections founder and psychologist Sameera Sullivan points out that mind reading in this manner can be dangerous and that it’s much better to ask instead of assuming to avoid hurting anyone in the process.

·         Talk About Boundaries

Knowing your limits is essential in a relationship, and many relationships will suffer from silence and ignoring these problems than they will ever suffer from violence, says Parikh. Don’t ignore your partner’s crossing of limits or things that hurt you. Talk about them and be direct and clear about where your boundaries are. Don’t become compliant. Avoiding a fight isn’t as positive as it sounds, and couples that fight healthily and regularly often have a stronger relationship. You should feel comfortable discussing these things with your partner; if not, that could be a huge red flag.

3.    Positive Reinforcement

Reinforcement is the act of continuing to make it clear that you love and appreciate your partner. It’s easy to accidentally fall out of the habit of being sweet and romantic to someone you’ve been in a relationship with for years and years.

But leaving the honeymoon phase doesn’t mean the sweetness should end, says Goldsmith. If anything, you need to continue working on your relationship forever, and you shouldn’t become complacent in the way you show your affection. Here are some ways to make sure positive reinforcement is still a part of your relationship:

·         Encourage And Support Your Partner

Offering words of encouragement shows that you think of your partner’s experiences and pay attention to what they’re going through. Expressing admiration at their improvements or successes and being supportive in more challenging times tells your partner that you care.

·         Surprise Your Partner Now And Then

These surprises show you’re thinking of your partner outside of the typical red-letter days. Clinical psychologist Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., also The Kurre and Klapow Show’s host, recommends tangible romantic gestures. Instead of sending emails or texts, buy tiny gifts, write small letters, or help them check something off their to-do list!

·         Schedule A Date Night

Date nights are a break from mundane, everyday life, states Maple Holistics Health and Wellness Expert Caleb Backe. You’re choosing to spend quality time with your partner outside of your daily life. They’re your partner in relaxation and the hustle and bustle. Plus, it’s fun to get that time to yourselves to hang out! It spices things up. You get to talk to each other and rekindle a spark. There’s no denying the positive effects these dates have, so make them a regular thing!

·         Hold Hands In Public

Klapow recommends that you and your partner hold hands in public – just like you did when you first began dating! This act is intimate but public, a display that you and your partner are together. It’s also a natural way to bond through touch while indicating that you are happily there for your partner, always!

·         Kiss Each Other More Often

When you first started courting your significant other, kissing was probably a highlight of your dates. As time goes on, in most relationships, make-out sessions are replaced by quick, chaste pecks on the lips or a kiss on the cheek. Sarah A. Intelligator, a Family Law lawyer and owner of the Law Offices of Sarah A. Intelligator, recommends that you never stop kissing each other as you did before. When you eliminate these heated shows of affection, you’re subconsciously sending the message that your partner is less desirable to you, and that can sour intimacy and fun.

·         Keep Romance Alive

Just because you’re comfortable with each other doesn’t mean you shouldn’t still flirt and be sappy partners in love! Keep buying flowers. Keep doing romantic things. Be embarrassingly romantic. Act like you’re still in the early “chase” stages of your relationship. You’d be surprised how much that can help keep the spark alive!

4.    Be Your People

When you’ve been with someone for a very long time, it’s easy to slip into a state where you don’t do anything without the other. You become almost interchangeable and, in the worst-case scenario, could get codependent.

This is very unhealthy because the common idea that a partnership is two halves making a whole is not accurate. A partnership is two whole people coming together out of love and appreciation. Your entire life shouldn’t be about your partner, and you shouldn’t be relying on them to give you everything you need. That’s too much pressure for anyone, and it’s blatantly unfair to yourself, too.

Here are some tips for being your own person while still being a unified couple in a relationship:

·         Give Each Other Space

Everyone needs alone time. Even the happiest couples need individual time to themselves, says Parikh. Learn to be comfortable and feel positive without your partner next to you at all times. Lead your own life! Have your own hobbies! Have your own me-time! And of course, respect that your partner also needs all of that, too.

·         Assess Yourself And Grow On Your Own

You need to be a strong person on your own, continually learning and growing with the years, to maintaining a healthy relationship. Your partner should be doing the same. That’s why you need to evaluate and assess yourself, says Amy Bishop, M.S., a couples therapist. There’s no denying that even the very best people can have negative or questionable behavior. We all have toxic or bad sides to us because we’re human and flawed. Your job is to continue learning from your mistakes and being aware of the things you need to work on. Put effort into growing and developing as a person, and your relationship will grow, mature, and become healthier with you. Don’t let your pride stop you from acknowledging your weaknesses!

·         Have Separate Friends

According to research, the least positive relationships most likely to fall apart are those where you have all the same mutual friends. Think about it – you have the same support group and have no social circles of your own, which is far from a positive factor. Worse still, if the relationship falls apart, the friend group is caught in an uncomfortable situation. Mutual friends are good, but have separate circles on top of that, too!

·         Take Care Of Yourself

You’re a grown adult, and you don’t need another human being to look out for you all the time. You get to decide what you want and need and how to spend your time. Yes, you should take your partner into account when your decisions or actions affect them. But if it’s just about you, then be independent! You don’t need your partner to help you with everything or be there for every second of your life, says Parikh. Having one person as your only go-to is toxic for them and for you. Besides, you can always tell your partner about your individual adventures later!

Final Thoughts On Some Things That Make A Relationship Work

Making a relationship works takes effort. You need to stay positive, communicate well, make sure your partner knows you love them, and continue to work on yourself. It might not be easy, but if you love the person you’re dating or married to, it’s certainly worth it!

Do you find that you think too much? When you overthink, you analyze everything to the point of anxiety. If you think you may be doing this, check out these ten indicators of overthinking and how they can be harmful to you. Later, we will share some tips to combat the cycle of overthinking to help you rebalance your state of mind.

What is overthinking?

The tendency to overthink means you have an abundance of thoughts that never work out into real action. These overactive thoughts produce nothing but stress and worry. You may worry about what happened in the past or what’s going to happen in the future. Overthinking is usually about things you can’t control. Thinking too much can be paralyzing and lead to an anxiety disorder. Consider these ten red flags you may see in your life if you’re struggling with overthinking.

1 – Lack of focus due to racing thoughts.

When you’re continually examining your thoughts, actions, and conversations, your thoughts get in the way of your ability to concentrate on your daily activities. Your ideas may weigh so heavily upon you that you become distracted from real-life responsibilities. If your thoughts interfere with your daily life tasks, it’s a red flag. Step back and figure out how to let go of thoughts that prevent you from living your life.

2 – Your thoughts interfere with your work.

One study discovered that when athletes overthink, it disrupts their performance. It’s no wonder because when you overthink, you examine every action you make. This introspection causes you to second guess and doubts your ability to do things. A trained athlete relies on their mental and physical ability to perform. In the same way, if your mind is distracted, and you doubt your abilities, you won’t be able to do your work. This process can be disruptive to your job. This is a big red flag indicating that you’re overthinking things.

3 – Not paying attention to the people in your life.

Overthinking causes you to be caught up in your world most of the time. You aren’t fully there for others because of your all-consuming thoughts. Overthinking causes you to think more about yourself than others. When you’re with others, you may be distracted by views like this:

• How do I feel right now?
• Why do I feel like this?
• Does this person like me?
• They look sad. It’s probably because of me.
• What did I do wrong?
• Are they mad at me?

This rumination is a self-consuming way to live. You are not paying rapt attention to what others are saying or feeling. People may perceive you as uncaring or thoughtless, even though you aren’t. Overthinking is detrimental to your relationship with friends and family because it causes you to live in your head.

4 – What’s real?

Researchers found that overthinking interferes with your long term memory. As you rehearse things over and over, what happened gets rewritten in your mind.  Things begin to look worse than they were when you rehearse them in your mind. It is easy to put a negative spin on the past. So what happened seems utterly different from what really happened, yet you believe your version of the situation. It’s a twisted web that affects your thoughts and feelings.

5 – Feel nervous all the time

Overthinking can make you feel always nervous. Your thoughts feel out of control and overwhelming. Being consumed with these thoughts steals your ability to relax. Your nervousness is unhealthy and could make you sick. Taking control of your thoughts is critical to avoid feeling nervous all the time.

6 – Physical ailments

Overthinking can lead to an anxiety disorder. Researchers have found that some physical illnesses are caused by anxiety and stress. These ailments include

• Headaches
• Ulcers
• Irritable bowel syndrome
• Strange aches and pains
• Insomnia
• High blood pressure
• Chest pain
• Panic attacks

If you’re having these physical problems and you think it could be related to your overthinking, be sure to speak with your doctor. They can diagnose the physical issues and help you find strategies to slow down your overactive thoughts.

7 – Fatigue

Your overthinking makes you feel as if the weight of the world is on your shoulders. This mental exhaustion leads to fatigue since your brain has no time to rest. Mental burnout causes extreme tiredness. All your introspection and constant thinking solve nothing, but it hurts you the most.

8 – Your rehash conversations

Rehashing your conversations with other people is a red flag indicating you’re overthinking.  Do you rehearse every word, every smile, or eyebrow that moved during your discussions? Do you feel that you must understand everything the person said in case you missed something?

This rehashing of conversations twists your brain and makes you feel emotionally draining. These thoughts are harmful to you and could lead to an anxiety disorder. If you find yourself doing this a lot, you may consider possibly speaking to a counselor to help you figure out why, precisely, you are doing this.

9 – Insomnia

Insomnia can be a side effect of an overly active brain. If you’re an overthinker, your mind may race, even at night. In fact, night time can exaggerate your fears. That’s when you’re most vulnerable to worry. When your sleep is interrupted nightly, it affects your ability to function, plus it clouds your thoughts even more.

10 – Overanalyzing everything

When you think too much, you probably tend to overanalyze people’s every action and word. If you walk past a friend who doesn’t look at you right away,  you assume they’re mad at you. You start to remember things you’ve said and wondered if you made them angry. You begin to worry that they’ll never speak to you again. Your snowballing thoughts run wild. It’s consuming and centers on what you did wrong.

How can you stop overthinking?

There are some helpful new habits you can try to break free from overthinking. When your thoughts start to run wild into all the possible things that could happen, stop, and ask yourself these questions.

• Is what I’m thinking right now true?
• Will these thoughts help me or make me feel bad?
• How could I look at this situation in a positive way?
• What are the chances that what I’m thinking could happen?

Here are some other helpful tools to break free from thinking too much.

 1 – Focus on what’s good

When you’re tempted to overthink and expect bad things, instead, turn your thoughts to what is right. Think of all the positive outcomes in life that could (and have) happened. Remember, you control your thoughts. Your thoughts don’t control you. Refuse to permit your mind to go to the scary what-if scenarios. Tell your thoughts who’s boss and focus on the good in your life.

 2 – Distract yourself

Having excess time on your hands isn’t helpful if you have a busy mind. Too much time allows time for your mind to run wild. Stay active, don’t let yourself idle time to just sit and think. Interact with people, go to events, or volunteer at your local library. Find ways to serve others, so you’re not focusing on yourself.

3 – Control is overrated

There are many scenarios in life that can’t be controlled, but there are things within your control. It’s part of life. Focusing on what you can’t control isn’t helpful, and it can lead to anxiety. Instead, focus on what outcomes you can control, like your attitude and your choices. Try to remember that you’re not the only one who feels like life gets out of control. Everyone has those moments. Many people find that having faith in God helps them. They believe they can trust God to help them through those uncontrollable situations. Take a deep breath and relax. Let go of what you can’t control.

4 – Loosen fear’s grip

Fear is a tyrant. It enables you to think too much about your failures or your potential failures. It’s easy to focus on all the ways you’ve messed up. But everyone fails. Failure is a big part of life. Let go of your fear of falling again or failing in the future. Refuse to let fear control your thoughts. See your failures as opportunities to have a new beginning.

5 – Journal writing helps you release your thoughts

Writing down all your thoughts is a great way to get your overthinking in control. Dumping those fearful, anxious thoughts on paper releases them from your brain. Tell yourself that once your opinions hit the paper, they stay there. No more thinking about them. If you want to reread the thoughts later, that’s okay, but don’t allow yourself to think about them again.

6 – Talk to a friend

Find a trusted friend or confidante to talk to about your overthinking. Explain to your friend when you’re prone to overthinking thinking. No doubt,  they’ve already noticed that you do this.  Just talking about overthinking with someone else can help you begin to let it go.

7 – Find community

Finding a good community can help you refocus. It keeps you busy being with and helping others instead of being alone with your thoughts. Find a church, yoga group, or running club where you can make good friends who share similar goals.

Final Thoughts: Now That You Know You Think Too Much, Take Action

Everybody over thinks things once in a while, but if your brain is always on hyper-drive,  it could be harmful to your health. Overthinking can lead to anxiety disorders, which can affect your health. If you think too much, use these suggested tools to stop the progression of overthinking. Try a couple of these ideas at first and add more over time. Remember, you’re in control of your thoughts, not the other way around. Enjoy the freedom of letting go of those things you can’t control and enjoy your life without an overactive mind.

Have you ever had vivid dreams? These are the dreams that are so real that you wake up feeling shaken or like you’re stuck in a fantasy realm. Some people try to interpret their dreams, and many think that the spirit world is trying to communicate with them in this realm.

While your higher power can communicate with you through dreams, there are also many other reasons why you might be having these vivid displays. To gain a better knowledge of why your eyelids become a movie screen at night, you must understand your sleep cycles.

The Five Stages of Sleep

During the first phase of sleep, you are in twilight or a light stage of rest. Though your brain frequency has slowed a bit, your muscles are still responsive. During the second phase, your body goes a bit deeper, and it’s more difficult to wake you.

Stage three is slow-wave sleep as an EEG of the brain shows that your brain waves are slowing down drastically. A noise of up to 100 decibels won’t disturb you during the third level. Delta waves are stage four, and it’s the last level before you head into REM sleep.

If you awaken in stage three or four, you will be quite groggy and may feel like you’re stuck in a sleep/wake realm. It will take you some time for your brain to reengage with being awake so that you may feel off for several minutes.

The third and final stage of sleep is REM. During this phase, your muscles don’t move, and your breathing becomes erratic and irregular. Your heart rate will increase a bit, but you won’t notice it.

You will also experience vivid dreams during this phase as your body is entirely under a brain induced state of muscle atonia. If your mind didn’t put you in a coma-like state, then you could hurt yourself or others.

When people experience disturbances during REM, they can have night terrors, sleepwalk, or act out things happening in their dreams. This is often caused by improper signals sent from the brain to the body.

10 Reasons Why You Have Vivid Dreams

Now that you understand the sleep cycles, you can understand the time frame of when you will experience vivid dreams. However, you still don’t know what causes them. Numerous things can cause your dreams to be so real they are haunting, but here are the top ten.

1. Medications

Did you know that medications can alter your sleep and cause you to have vivid dreams? The most common medications that can affect your REM state are blood pressure drugs, antidepressants, smoking cessation medicines, and things used to treat Parkinson’s disease.

Even some herbal over-the-counter meds can negatively impact your sleep too. Melatonin is notorious for causing vivid dreams, even though it’s completely safe.

2. Stress or Anxiety

All the difficulties you have during the day can bother your subconscious at night. Significant events such as weddings, arguments with family members, divorce, or buying a new home can trigger vivid dreaming.

Stress is inevitable, but the trauma of the day can affect you when you rest. Anxiety, sexual abuse, or a car accident can be relived time and time again in your REM sleep. When you have disturbing or intense nightmares, trauma is almost always to blame.

3. Substance Abuse

Using drugs for recreational use like heroin, meth, cocaine, and opiates can negatively impact your sleep. The most common time to experience such dreams is when you are trying to withdrawal from these drugs. The withdrawal period can be quite intense, and your brain is struggling to find a new normal.

4. Mental Health Disorders

Have you ever awakened from you a dream in a state of panic? Depression causes colorful dreams, and they can lead to panic attacks. However, these are not the only mental health issues that are a concern.

People with schizophrenia or a dissociative identity disorder can also have vivid dreams from their medications or when they stop taking drugs. Those who already experience hallucinations or delusions seem to slip into the lucid dreaming state with ease.

Of all the mental health issues, anxiety seems to be the problem that causes the most REM dreams. A person with anxiety is always in a state of angst, and this state is not alleviated by sleep for many.

5. Physical Illness

Many physical illnesses can cause you to dream more frequently. While you may not remember many of them, you can have some lurid encounters. If you have diabetes and your blood sugar drops to a low level, you can have some intense dreams.

6. Pregnancy

Colorful dreams and nightmares are commonplace during pregnancy. At times, the strain of arranging for the birth of the child contributes to these occurrences. Variations of hormones may also play a part in why women dream so much during pregnancy.

7. Alcohol

Many people drink alcohol because they feel it helps them get to sleep. While it may enhance your rest, it can suppress the REM or vital part of your slumber.

The vivid dreams are even more remarkable when a person stops drinking and tries to maintain sobriety. Thankfully, intense dreams will eventually pass.

8. Narcolepsy

Individuals with narcolepsy frequently say that they vividly dream. Sadly, many describe the encounters as strange or even disturbing. Narcolepsy is a disorder that confuses the barriers of slumber and alertness.

Folks with this ailment feel extraordinarily sleepy and exhausted during the day. Warning Signs include falling to sleep quickly and suffering an abrupt loss of muscle control. A person with narcolepsy will go into REM moments after falling asleep.

Even a small nap can cause the individual with narcolepsy to start having bright dreams. Also, lucid dreaming is not uncommon, so a person cannot distinguish between being awake or asleep.

9. Sleep Deprivation

Anytime you are short on rest, your body can experience crazy dreams. Part of the issue is that the body is so tired it skips over the four stages of sleep and goes right to REM. This is commonly observed in people who have insomnia, sleep apnea, or just haven’t got enough sleep.

10.Foods You Eat Specifically Spicy Ones

While there’s not a great deal of science behind this theory, it’s believed that spicy foods can mess with your sleep. When you eat anything filled with spices, it increases the body’s temperature slightly. The elevated temperature can disrupt your sleep.

A study was conducted at the Cleveland Clinic to test the theory of spicy foods and a poor night’s rest. They concluded that eating flaming hot dishes can cause bizarre dreams.

The body must work extra hard to digest these spicy foods, so it interferes with sleep. This is especially true if a person has heartburn that keeps them up.

If you’re going to eat things on the hot side, you must do it at least 2-3 hours before bed.

Understanding the Side Effects of Vivid Dreams

If you suffer from colorful dreams for several nights a week, it can cause all kinds of problems for you. The most common side effects of these dreams are:

•Daytime Sleepiness

•Suicidal Attempts or Thinking

•Resisting Sleep

•Mood Problems

When you don’t get the rest you need, then you cannot function properly. If insomnia is at the crux of your problem, then you need to find ways to combat this issue. A situation like narcolepsy is severe and requires medical intervention.

You can be quite troublesome to be around when you’re not getting enough sleep. Having problems with scary dreams that wake you up in a state of panic can affect your whole day and mood.

Final Thoughts on Getting Help for Your Vivid Dreams

It’s essential to pinpoint the cause of the dreams, especially if they are more like nightmares. You may be eating the wrong foods too close to bedtime, or you may have severe stress in your life that is causing significant issues.

Additionally, any substantial changes in your life, like death or divorce, can affect your rest.

The best way to combat the issues caused by stress is to use things like meditation, yoga, or counseling. Taking an herbal supplement like valerian root or melatonin to help you rest is advisable if you’re not getting at least 7-8 hours of sleep each night. You can quickly develop a sleep debt and have more significant issues than some wild dreams.

Try to avoid medications that induce sleep as they can often cause more harm than they do good. Many herbal things can induce sleep, which is perfectly safe. When you have issues with vivid dreams, you need to talk to someone professionally.

When they become more frequent and troubling, your therapist or mental health professional should be alerted to the issue. They can help you find a way to calm the occurrences and cope with them during this phase. Thankfully, these bright dreams won’t last forever, and soon things will be back to normal.

Chemical dryer sheets are as popular as laundry detergent when it comes to washing clothes. They work well – they soften your clothes and eliminate static electricity. However, have you ever stopped to think about what’s in dryer sheets? After all, whatever is in them is getting melted all over your clothes every time you use them.

Chemical dryer sheets are not as safe as you think they are. Most people have never considered the vagueness of these sheets. The truth is that they could be harmful to you as well as the environment. Here are five reasons you should toss them out (plus alternatives you can use instead).

5 Reasons to Toss Out Dryer Sheets

Do you use these products when you do your laundry chores? Here are several reasons why you should stop!

1. There is no government regulation of dryer sheets.

Agencies like the FDA or the USDA often regulate many products on the market to ensure their safety. However, dryer sheets aren’t regulated by any government agency in the United States. Manufacturers have total freedom to make their dryer sheets however they want to.

The reason for this is that dryer sheets aren’t meant for human consumption or for topical use (meaning on the skin). Since they’re technically meant for clothing, this means they don’t need to be regulated for human safety as far as the body is concerned.

This means that manufacturers can put anything in their dryer sheets that do not make them flammable. That’s a scary thought when there are so many dangerous substances on the market.

It would be nice to be able to trust the honor system. However, with the history of recalled products in this country, that doesn’t seem logical. Many manufacturers will use anything in their products that are cheap and helps them save money.

2. They contain unknown chemicals.

If you’ve ever taken the time to read the ingredients listed on a box of chemical dryer sheets? If you have, you probably found one of two things. Either the ingredients listed were some vague description that doesn’t really tell you what’s in them (like the synthetic fragrance or woven sheets) or the ingredients weren’t listed at all.

Since dryer sheets aren’t regulated, they aren’t required to list the ingredients that they use. However, a quick internet search can reveal the most common ingredients used in chemical dryer sheets. You may be shocked by what you find.

Believe it or not, the contents of the ingredients list are not the biggest problem. The problem with not listing ingredients is that some people may be allergic to them. How can they make the determination that a brand of dryer sheets is good for them if the ingredients aren’t listed on the box? They can’t.

3. They are harmful to the environment.

The benefits of recycling and biodegradable materials have been well established and taught. However, most chemical dryer sheets are not biodegradable. They are made of synthetic materials that will continue to pile up in landfills as more and more people use them.

There are a few biodegradable brands out there. However, they’re only slightly better than regular brands. They still don’t list their ingredients and they still aren’t regulated.

They can also still be bad for allergies. Synthetic fragrances are a big allergy trigger. They also emit volatile organic compounds that are harmful to people and the environment. Who knows what other triggers are in the sheets?

4. They can cause your dryer to malfunction.

These clothing softener products contain a meltable coating that gets all over your clothes as the dryer tumbles. The problem with this is that this coating also gets all over your dryer as well. It may take a while, but with every dryer sheet you use, you’re closer to making your dryer malfunction and even create a fire hazard.

For one, this coating will clog your lint trap. Even if you remove the lint after each dry, the coating is so thin that it will clog the fine mesh. You’ll need to perform extra cleaning, likely with a toothbrush or something similar, to ensure that the lint trap doesn’t clog.

There is a part inside your dryer called the electronic monitoring sensor. This part is what senses that your clothes are dry and turns your dryer off (if you have this feature). The coating from the dryer sheet can coat this sensor causing it to malfunction. This means your clothes could over-dry and your electric bill could increase for no reason.

5. There has been little research into the effects of the unknown chemicals.

Not only are these unregulated sheets made with unknown chemicals, but no one’s done much research into how these chemicals are affecting people or the environment. There aren’t any relevant clinical trials to review and there is no data to compare. The scientific community has just accepted dryer sheets as they are.

It could be because researching dryer sheets isn’t high on the list of research priorities. It’s true that there are plenty of other topics that need to be researched more – cancer, Alzheimer’s disease, GMO foods – but someone needs to shine a light on this unregulated industry. Dryer sheets could be doing serious harm and we wouldn’t know it until thousands or even millions have died.

There is a solution to this problem, but it involves you–the consumer. You could choose substitutes for dryer sheets. There are plenty of safe, natural substitutes that will give you the same or better results than those chemical-laced sheets. Keep reading to learn about some of them.

What You Can Use Instead

Here are several products to try instead of commercial products.

Wool Dryer Balls

Wool dryer balls are an excellent alternative. It’s an all-natural fabric (more about that below). They do everything that dryer sheets do, but they do it better. Plus, they’re long-lasting and inexpensive.

Wool dryer balls help your dryer dry your clothes up to 20% faster. Your energy costs will begin to decrease with the use of them. Unlike sheets, you’ll have to add several wool balls to the dryer, but you also get a lot more of them in the box.

Vinegar

Vinegar seems to always be a solution to everything. It just happens to be a great solution to finding a substitute for dryer sheets. White vinegar is best because it won’t leave any type of color stain on the clothes.

Vinegar will soften the fabric very well. You’ll also have the added benefit of it disinfecting your dryer. If you’re worried about your clothes having a vinegar smell after drying, you can tuck that worry away. Just air them out for a while and the vinegar scent will disappear.

Note: don’t go crazy with the white vinegar. A quarter of a cup will do the job. Simply soak a washcloth with it and toss it in with the rest of the laundry.

Baking Soda

Baking soda works like vinegar, but it’s better if you put it in the washing machine instead of the dryer. It has so many benefits for both your clothes and the washing machine. Not only will it soften your fabrics, but it will knock out odors, brighten colors, and clean the washing machine.

Note: if you decide to combine methods, do not combine vinegar and baking soda! You will have a volcanic-like eruption flowing out of your washing machine.

Aluminum Foil

Aluminum foil will get static electricity out of your clothes better than anything else you could use. It also helps to dry the clothes faster. Simple make some aluminum foil balls and toss them in with the laundry. Make sure you save them – they are reusable.

Natural Fabrics

You could cut out the need for dryer sheets, dryer balls, or dryer anything by wearing natural fabrics. These types of fabrics don’t collect static electricity, so you’ll have no need for a dryer aid. They’re also great for people who may have allergies since they don’t irritate the skin. Examples are cotton, bamboo, silk, and wool.

Reusable Dryer Sheets

While these are still dryer sheets, they are made from natural fabrics and contain no chemicals or synthetic fragrances. That means you these products aren’t harmful to the environment, they aren’t a fire hazard, and they’re safe for people with sensitive skin. Plus, you’ll cut back on waste since you won’t be constantly throwing them away. It’s a win-win situation.

Final Thoughts on Why You Should Throw Out Chemical Dryer Sheets

There are worse things in the world than chemical dryer sheets, but that still doesn’t mean you should keep buying them. Every little thing you can do to keep yourself and your family healthy, plus help the environment, is important. Getting rid of chemical dryer sheets is a simple way to do your part.

It’s easy to make the change because the alternatives that were presented are easy to implement. In fact, you probably have some of the supplies in your home already so what do you have to lose by giving them a try? You’ll likely be pleasantly surprised at the results of ditching those chemical-laced sheets.

Understanding the Different Skin Cancer Types and How to Prevent Them

Cancer is a word that many of us fear. Hearing that you or a loved one have developed skin cancer can make your mind jump to conclusions out of shock and worry.

But just what types of skin cancers are dangerous, and how can you prevent yourself from getting skin cancer?

There are a few skin cancer types that vary in severity and can be prevented with different treatments. 

What is Skin Cancer?

Skin cancer is what happens when the cells that make up your skin begin to mutate into cancer cells that divide out of control. It is the most common type of cancer that occurs in the United States to this day. 

While skin cancer usually occurs on skin that is exposed to sunlight, it can also form in the lower layers of skin and be harder to detect. 

Skin Cancer Types and Treatment Options

While there are many different types of skin cancer, there are four common types that will be discussed. Here are the signs, symptoms, and treatments for each type of common skin cancer.

Basal Cell Carcinoma

Basal cell carcinoma is among the most common and least worrisome type of skin cancer. It often develops on areas of the skin that are the most exposed to sunlight, including the scalp, face, and neck area.

It shows itself as a mildly transparent bump on the skin, though it can take other forms as well. Some signs of this type of cancer can include:

• Pearly white bumps on the skin, or a bump of skin with a translucent outside; these often have visible blood vessels underneath and has a tendency to rupture or bleed
• Brown, black, or blue lesions with a raised, translucent border
• Scaly reddish patches on the back or chest
• Waxy white lesions without a visible border

While basal cell carcinoma is usually not dangerous, you should contact a doctor if you notice any sudden changes to an existing bump, or if a bump that was previously removed has resurfaced. 

If you should discover a bump on your skin, don’t worry—basal cell carcinoma can usually be removed with a simple skin biopsy, or removing the small piece of cancerous skin. Cases of basal cell carcinoma spreading or developing into other types of cancer are rare, but you should still talk with your doctor about it to be safe.

Dr. Johnny Gurgen specializes in the removal of skin cancers and can help you to make sure your skin is healthy again. 

Melanoma

Melanoma is a far more serious type of skin cancer that can develop anywhere on the body, though it primarily appears in areas of skin that are exposed to sunlight. The most at-risk individuals for developing melanoma are women under 40 years old, though anyone is capable of getting it. 

Melanomas often begin as changes to existing moles, such as growths or darkened skin. However, they can also appear suddenly on otherwise normal skin.

There are steps you can take to find out if your mole is normal and healthy. Check to see if it:

1. Has an irregular border or shape
2. Has changed in color noticeably
3. Has grown larger than 6 millimeters in diameter
4. Has changed in either look, size, or sensation, such as if it has grown itchy or painful over time

If any of the above circumstances are true, then you should go to get it checked by a doctor, as it may be a melanoma. It’s crucial to catch this type early so that it doesn’t go unchecked.

Nonmelanoma Skin Cancer

Nonmelanoma skin cancer is a broad term used to describe any cancer that isn’t melanoma. This encompasses any rarer type of skin cancer, and as such has a variety of treatment options depending on the type of cancer involved.

These types of cancers will often need to be removed through surgery; if you’ve noticed any odd changes to your skin that you can’t account for, talk with your doctor about nonmelanoma skin cancer today.

Squamous Cell Carcinoma of the Skin

While not life-threatening, squamous cell carcinoma of the skin can be a particularly aggressive form of cancer that can cause serious damage if left untreated. This is because it tends to form in deeper layers of the skin. 

This type of cancer is also prone to spreading along the skin and through other parts of the body as well. If you notice any new, painful red sores on your skin or inside of your mouth that doesn’t go away on its own, you should talk with your doctor immediately.

How to Prevent Skin Cancer

Fortunately, there are many different ways that you can protect yourself from getting skin cancer. Certain lifestyle changes and protective measures can help to keep you safe from skin cancer, such as:

• Keeping away from direct sunlight, tanning beds, and other forms of UV light
• Wearing sunscreen year-round while outside
• Wearing protective clothing to prevent sun damage
• Examining your skin frequently for changes or variations in moles or bumps

By keeping these tips in mind and checking yourself regularly, you can help protect yourself from developing skin cancer. 

Keep Your Skin Healthy

Now that you know the different skin cancer types and how to prevent them, you’re ready to start living your new healthy life with proper precautions in place. Keep yourself healthy, happy, and cancer-free, and remember to check your skin frequently for any potential changes. 

What have you learned about skin cancer? Have you had experiences with any of the above skin cancers that you’d like to share?

We’d love to hear your thoughts! Be sure to leave a comment with your story down below, and any tips you have for protecting yourself against skin cancer.

The Art of E-Commerce: Your Guide to Selling Your Makeup Online

The cosmetic and beauty market’s set to hit $438.38 billion in the next 6 years. Coupled with the $9.09 trillion e-commerce market value, it’s never been a better time to sell makeup online.

These numbers reflect a booming digital world in which businesses are thriving. The entrepreneurial spirit’s at its peak and there are many resources to build your own online store.

As society changes, so does the beauty market. If your passion for makeup has brought you to the masses, it’s time to be part of the evolution.

Your dream to start a beauty brand awaits you. Here’s what to know.

Sell Makeup Online

While beauty and business may pose as opposites, they go hand-in-hand. That said, having a passion for makeup’s not enough. If you’re seeking success in the e-commerce world, there’s a lot to learn.

1. Establish Your Demographic

First thing’s first. You won’t get too far if you don’t know your audience. Ask yourself the following:

• Why do I want to sell makeup online?
• Have others encouraged me to open my store?
• Who’s expressed interest in my offerings?
• Who would enjoy this service?

Getting clear on your motives clarifies the rest of your creative pursuits. It helps with marketing, tone, branding, and staying authentic.

Since makeup serves different functions, it has various contexts. Different makeup angles include:

• Costume
• Anti-aging
• Professional
• Everyday
• Natural
• Organic

Makeup’s far more than just colors and brands. How it’s made, when to use it, and who it serves are top focuses.

2. Type of Product

Once you know your demographic, you can identify what you’re offering. Before you sell makeup online, there are a few things to consider.

What type of makeup is it? Do you want your own operation, or to scale the business?

Personal Products

If you’re selling personal products, you’ll have to abide by the Federal Drug and Cosmetic (FD&C) guidelines. The good news is once you do, you’ll gain rapport with your audience. 

Personal products involve branding, manufacturing, and selling all on your own. One person operations are manageable for smaller businesses.

White Label Products

If you’re struggling to scale, you might transition to white label products. White-labeling means using a third-party manufacturer while using your branding and logos.

It’s simpler to manage your own products, but it’s more efficient to white-label if you have a high demand.

Once you get into packaging, you’ll want to know about the Fair Packaging and Labeling Act (FPLA) to meet appropriate standards.

3. E-Commerce Methods

If you want to sell makeup, you’ll need an online store. The e-commerce world gives you options. You can:

1. Hire a web developer to build your store
2. Use online marketplaces like Amazon
3. Sell through social media

Successful businesses require big-picture planning. Consider which platforms you’ll use for customer engagement. That way, whatever you choose as your selling method can complement your outreach strategies.

If you want to start an online store, consider it a game. There are options and it’s up to you to choose your route.

Learning the language is important, but finding what’s best for you is the way to make it work.

4. Online Presence

Consider prioritizing your online platforms. If you already have a website, that means you likely have a following. 

Incorporating an e-commerce platform is easier with a following. While you’re building, you can tell your audience what’s coming.

If you don’t have a strong online presence, your store will be your big break. Consider how a website or social media platform can drive traffic to your shop.

5. Digital Marketing Strategies

Once you establish your online presence, you’ll want to implement digital marketing practices. One of the smartest ones to adopt is SEO—or search engine optimization.

The goal’s to become a trustworthy vendor and build reviews. Using keywords, strategic phrasing, and links can drive traffic to your site and boost your sales.

6. Follow Through 

The easiest mistake to make with online stores is focusing on the building more than the follow-through. The good news is the solution rests in shifting your focus. 

Amongst the many moving parts of building a business, it’s easy to focus on selling. While that’s exciting and important, things like order fulfillment need proper attention.

To some, making sales and order fulfillment sound like the same thing. The reality is there are many steps between a consumer’s sale and them receiving the product. The backend tasks are as important as the frontend—if not more.

Order fulfillment services have the following benefits:

• Meet demand
• Get the product to the consumer fast

Order fulfillment services ensure customers are literally fulfilled with their order. Customer service remains the greatest tell of a successful business. That means tending to the consumer the whole way through.

Remember, consumers don’t know you, they only know your product. As a result, your product is their experience of you. Thus, manufacturing, labeling, buying, and shipping must be seamless.

Start a Beauty Brand

Once you fuse your business and beauty inspiration, you’re ready to start a beauty brand. Brands are impressionable, bold, and representative of you and your products. Building your brand means knowing the following:

• What makes you and your products different?
• What makes you memorable?
• Why should people come back?
• What’s worthwhile about this brand?

While there’s ample opportunity for beauty brands in e-commerce, the market’s laden with competition. That means one thing. Do your research!

Then, knowing what makes you stand out won’t be a pipedream—it’ll be factual. Find gaps in the industry and fill them with your passion and expertise.

Get Big in the Beauty Biz

Let the booming beauty business numbers encourage you to become part of it. Entrepreneurs fuel the economy with their small businesses. That means there’s ample proof that you can do the same.

If you want to sell makeup online, it’s not a question of whether you should, but how you will! Learn for yourself how both your beauty and business inspirations make a fierce combo.

For more on maximizing your business development plans, check out our latest blog posts.

The drive to stand out from the crowd and be special and unique is a mighty one. But with all the fantastic people in the world doing incredible things with their lives, you might sometimes feel lost in it all.

But have some positive thinking! You’re unique, even when you don’t feel like you are. You’re more than just a sum of your parts, and yet even those parts alone can make you even more distinct. Here are six special things that make you unique.

1.    Your Personality

Personality refers to multiple different aspects of one’s identity. Typically, character is seen most clearly in the way you interact with others, so behavior plays a significant role in demonstrating character. A mix of acquired and inherent factors affect these characteristics. Here are some aspects of personality that make you unique:

·         Your Attitude

The way you perceive the world dictates your attitude, and that attitude can have huge effects on negative and positive thinking. You can drag others down with a bad mood or lift others up with the right attitude. The way your perspective is shaped can often influence your success and progress in life. If you tend to look on the bright side of things, you’re likely to enjoy more accomplishments and have more positive experiences with those around you.

·         Your Perspectives

Only you see things exactly as you do. Only you have lived in your shoes, seen things from your angle, and experienced life uniquely as you are. This combination of knowledge and thought leads to a distinct perspective. Even if you have a similar view to others, you are still entirely unique in your complete perspective on the world! This is also why it’s important to listen to other people’s thoughts and ideas, too, as they provide views you will never have otherwise.

·         Your Sense Of Humor

Who and what do you find funny? What kinds of jokes do you tell? How do you tell them? What makes you laugh? What don’t you find funny? All these details add up to your overarching sense of humor, and that makes you unique, too!

·         Your Quirks

You are a collection of different bits and pieces that all come together to make you a standalone individual. This includes many quirks, like little things you do, ways you react to something, or ways you speak. Things like this can add to your uniqueness and make you stand out!

2.    Where You Grew Up

Did you know that your home environment as a child can affect how you develop and grow? Studies on adopted children who enter better socioeconomic homes show a clear correlation between IQ and home environment. A child adopted from a poor environment into a wealthy household is likely to score a more positive result on an IQ test than someone adopted into a poor home.

But why does this happen? Is it indeed wealth that dictates intelligence? Well, that’s unlikely to be the case. It seems more likely that the environment of poor and wealthy homes is to blame instead, as factors like stress are known to damage the brain and affect development. This factor is particularly true for children whose brains are still developing, according to research. Living in a more impoverished home or a more dangerous neighborhood could potentially worsen the risk of chronic stress patterns.

Of course, it’s also worth stating that several other things can affect stress levels than financial status. Abusive homes, bullying at school, or feeling repressed when growing up can lead to stress levels that affect cognitive development.

3.    Your Identity

Can you answer this question–“Who are you?”. That question is a straightforward one, and its answers lie in your entire being – or, more specifically, in your identity. Here are some aspects of identity that make you a unique individual:

·         Style

What is your personal style? How do you present yourself to others? What types of clothes and accessories do you wear? Do you use makeup? How do you do your hair? What’s your preferred aesthetic? These things are a part of your external identity!

·         Ethnicity and Culture

Where did you grow up? What is your ethnic origin? Do you feel pride and kinship for your ethnicity or culture? Do you feel disconnected from it? What things from these backgrounds do you bring with you in your life today? For many people, these things are huge parts of identity.

·         Age

Believe it or not, age can be a considerable part of the identity that makes you unique. How old do you feel? How much experience do you have? Are there things about your body that have changed? These things can all influence aspects of your identity.

·         Gender

Are you a man? A woman? Neither? Something in between? Nothing at all? This can make up a big part of your identity. It’s worth noting that gender and sex are two different things; studies discuss gender as something social, not biological, though the theory is still being fleshed out with research. This means that you are free to analyze your gender more closely. What aspects of you are feminine? Which ones are masculine? What do you see in yourself?

·         Spirituality

Are you a religious person? Do you nurture your spiritual health with prayer, meditation, or other techniques? Or do you practice unorthodox forms of spirituality? Do you seek to uncover mysteries of the universe? These are great questions that can give you a lot of insight into your own identity.

·         Beliefs

What is your political alignment? How about your thoughts on current events? What is your view on the world and life? Beliefs form your opinions and, eventually, your personality, making them a significant part of a unique identity.

4.    What You Like

You’re not defined exclusively by your interests, but you can’t deny that they play quite a role when it comes to the people you attract or surround yourself with. It can also say a lot about who you are. Here are some examples of how!

·         Hobbies

How do you like to spend your time? Are your hobbies mainly solitary, or do they involve others? Do your hobbies require patience, or are they very action-oriented? Are those hobbies commonly associated with people of your profession, temperament, or appearance? All these questions contribute to how your hobbies make you unique.

·         Passions and Goals

What is it that drives you and moves you forward every day, even when the going gets tough? What helps you keep your positive thinking? How did these goals and passions become entrenched in the first place? Often, what someone is passionate about plays a significant role in determining their personality or community!

·         Habits

What are some things you do without even realizing it? How do you tend to spend your days? Do you follow a routine? What are some good and poor habits you have, and do you care about them? Habits often say a lot about what a person finds familiar and comfortable.

5.    Your Experiences

No one can deny that experiences shape the person you are today. You are often a product of the things you’ve been through. This doesn’t mean you’re defined by your part, but it does mean that you learn and grow through them. Here are some ways your experiences make you unique:

·         Childhood

We’ve already touched on the ways your environment growing up influences who you become. That applies to all aspects of your childhood. How did you grow up? What parenting styles did your parents favor? Research indicates that what happens in your youth is most likely to dictate the adult you become.

·         Trauma

Most people have been through trauma at some point in their lives. How has your trauma harmed you? Are you still struggling to overcome it? What have you learned from it? How has it influenced the way you respond to things today? It’s not unusual at all to feel like you became a different person after experiencing trauma.

·         Opportunities

What opportunities were provided to you in life? What inherent privileges were you born with? Have you seized or missed great opportunities? Without the opportunities you were given, you would likely be in a very different place than you are now – and that’s why they’re part of what makes you unique!

·         General Experiences

The things you have been through, whether positive or negative, have all taught you lessons or changed you in some way. How you responded to each of those experiences has also dictated much of who you are now!

6.    Nature and Nurture

For years, experts have referred to the debate of what affects growth and development as “nature vs. nurture.” This, however, might be the wrong way of thinking about it. Based on our list here today, it is reasonably evident that both aspects affect your unique personality and individuality.

Nature accounts for – as an example – your risk factors for disorders, your appearance, and even some part of your temperament. It’s boiled down to simple genetics, and that’s what nature is all about: biological reality. But some aspects of nature never come into play at all, and DNA cannot dictate every possible part of who you become. If genetics were indeed all that mattered, twins who share the same DNA would not emerge from the womb with differences in appearance and personality.

On the other hand, nurture is responsible for – as an example – your values, the lessons you’ve learned from experiences, and things that make you feel nostalgic for your childhood. It’s not just about family, but about experiences, mistakes, your hometown, how well you were cared for… the list goes on! If nurture were indeed all that mattered, experts wouldn’t have uncovered so many links between genetics and different risks in life.

So what, then, is the likely answer in the nature vs. nurture debate? The answer is that there shouldn’t have been a debate between them in the first place! No aspects of nature and nurture exist in a vacuum. They intertwine and work with each other to create the person that you are. Elements of your nature interact with aspects of your nurture to provide you with unique experiences, thoughts, and reactions.

Final Thoughts On Some Things That Make You Unique

Many people can view uniqueness as a bit of a paradox. Since every person in the world is, indeed, unique, are you unique at all? Well, there’s no direct answer to that, but no matter what, you are a separate and distinct individual from those around you. A million different factors all had to align for you to be exactly who you are today – and that’s a beautiful thing!

Does Renters Insurance Cover Storage Units?: A Complete Guide

When you’re renting a home, you rarely have the storage space needed to keep all your belongings in your apartment or house. Storage units solve the problem, but of course, they come with issues of their own, such as the risk of fire or burglary.

Having renters insurance is a smart idea, but do you need two policies? Or does renters insurance cover storage units?

Here’s what you need to know.

Does Renters Insurance Cover Storage Units?

Yes, if you buy renters insurance, then it will cover your storage unit.

Every policy is different, but the same rules should apply to your storage unit as your rental unit. That means fire, tornadoes, burglary, and water damage will all fall under your policy.

There are limits. You won’t enjoy the same coverage for both your rental and your unit. Policies typically cap storage unit insurance at 10% of your total policy value. So, if you have $50,000 in renters insurance, then you have $5,000 in coverage for your storage unit.

What Isn’t Covered?

There are a few instances when your policy won’t kick in after an emergency.

First, if you need to claim a result of a flood, earthquake, or pest, then your insurance won’t cover you. You typically need specific flood insurance to protect your possessions.

Second, neither renters nor storage unit insurance cover certain high-value items. Storage unit coverage never includes things like gold, musical instruments, valuable art, or other rare items. If you have jewelry (including expensive wedding rings), then you likely need to add a jewelry insurance rider or seek out insurance policies that cover your valuable items specifically.

There may be other limitation clauses depending on your state and policy provider. Always read the policy in full before deciding on the best storage unit insurance for you.

When Should You Buy Renters Insurance and Storage Unit Insurance?

So, when should you buy both renters and storage unit insurance?

Most people won’t need both, but you might consider looking for two policies if 10% of your policy value doesn’t cover what’s going into storage.

You might find this to be the case if you’re downsizing from a family home into an apartment and keeping the vast majority of your things. In this case, you would have a significant amount of furniture or other items into storage either temporarily or permanently, and $1,000 to $5,000 wouldn’t cover the value your storage unit.

What about storing valuable possessions? As noted before, you typically need policies covering your valuable items specifically or riders that do so rather than buying two of the same policy (renters and storage unit).

Make Sure You Have the Right Cover

Does renters insurance cover storage units? The answer is yes! However, there are policy limits.

If you have unique needs, such as a significant amount of stuff in storage or high-value items, then you’re likely to need multiple policies or riders for full coverage. Make sure you talk to an agent before you sign the dotted line. Because when you have the right cover, you can rest easy.

Are you looking for more helpful content? Visit the finance archive for more money matters.

Do you have mental strength? The world is chaotic, and you are either at a position where you’re struggling or going through life as a superhero. Your daily concerns are all over the place, from dirty dishes to global warming.

It seems that it’s almost impossible for you not to let the problems of the day get to you. It will help if you improve your mental strength by keeping your stress levels in check. If you want to have a productive and healthy life, then you must do this monumental task for you and others.

Ten Ways to Enhance Your Mental Strength

Have you ever been to the doctor and was told that you need to reduce stress? It seems like such a simple thing, but most people find it completely overwhelming. You can reduce your stress and protect your mental health by engaging in these ten simple things.

1. Set Boundaries

Do you have a hard time saying “no” to people? Why is it that you always try to take on more than you can handle because you’re afraid that you might upset someone? It would help if you learned how to use the word “no” to protect your mental strength.

If you’re having a hard time with the concept, then practice in front of a mirror. Say things like, “No, I will not work overtime or take on any more tasks.” When you practice this independence in private, you’ll be more apt to use it in public. Learn to set boundaries so that you don’t become overwhelmed with extra tasks.

2. Recite Positive Affirmations

A wise old proverb says that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he, so you must be careful that you’re not full of negativity. Did you know that negativity can affect your mental health? Recite positive affirmations daily.

When you first get out of bed in the morning, try saying the following things:

• I will accomplish all of my goals.
• I am a fantastic person.
• I’m loved by my family and friends.
• I am a productive individual.
• I feel great.
• I’m going to have a great day.

When you start feeding your inner man with positivity, you will be amazed at the outcome. Start your day on a positive note even if you got up on the “wrong side of the bed.”

3. Stop Overthinking

Why do people tend to overthink? Rather than waiting for the verdict, you’re borrowing trouble from tomorrow. It’s like getting test results on a suspicious lump you have on your body.

Before the results come in, you’ve already got yourself on chemotherapy and writing your goodbye letters. The fact is that it might be something simple that isn’t malignant, but if you don’t stop overthinking every detail, you will drive yourself crazy.

4. Use Self-Care

Remember one thing in life you cannot pour out of an empty cup. If you want to take care of others and do an excellent job at work, you must learn to practice self-care. Make time for you each day, even if it’s only 30 minutes.

5. Practice Deep Breathing

Do you ever feel like you have a significant weight on your chest? Stress, panic, and anxiety can make you feel overloaded. Thankfully, when you practice deep breathing, you’re releasing that tension you feel.

You can use many methods when you do deep breathing, but the most common way is to inhale to the count of seven, hold the breaths for a count of seven, and then release them slowly for the count of seven. It’s a simple yet amazingly effective exercise.

6. Be Grateful

Do you ever sit back and count your blessings and be grateful for all the things you’ve been given? Did you wake up and take a warm shower, eat breakfast, and get into a nice car to drive to work?

Do you have family and friends who love and support you for whatever life throws your way? Do you have food in your cabinets and money in your checking account? Many people are homeless, and they could only dream about having a small portion of the things you have. Be grateful for what the universe has given you.

7. Exercise

One of the best ways to protect your mental strength is by engaging in exercise each day. You only need about 20 minutes to work out, but the effects it has on your brain is astounding.

Research shows that when you are working out, you’re releasing feel-good endorphins in your brain. You’re also increasing the production of vital neurotransmitters that regulate your moods like dopamine and serotonin. You should add a healthy diet to your day that has little carbohydrates and sugars.

The more protein and healthy fats you consume, along with your workout plan, can keep you in an adequate space and protect your mental strength.

8. Get Fresh Air

There’s something tranquil about a breath of fresh air? Air is life, and you need it to survive. Research shows that when many people have a panic attack and feel those fight or flight sensations kicking in, they often run to the outdoors.

There’s something magical about Mother Nature and her ability to calm you almost instantly. When life seems to overwhelm you, then you should go outside and look up into the heavens. Feel the golden rays of sun shining on your face and breathe in the flowers’ aroma and other fresh scents.

9. Engage in Yoga

You probably hear a lot of hype about yoga as a workout. However, most people have no clue the power it has on your mental health. Yoga first helps you to form a sense of self. It will then move you into a better place by altering you from the sympathetic to the parasympathetic nervous system.

Many studies have been conducted on this art form, and the results are overwhelmingly positive. Researchers show that it gives you mental clarity and helps with depression, anxiety, and other mental illnesses. Additionally, they have found that it has a profound effect on post-traumatic stress sufferers too.

Learning breathing techniques and body movements can do a world of good for your mental state. The great thing about this art form is that it can be modified for all body types and endurance levels.

10. Practice Positive Thinking

Are you a “Negative Nelly” or do you see yourself as a “Positive Pearl?” It’s hard to be positive in life with destruction on every corner. Do you ever feel like you want to throw in the towel?

Many people want to give up, but that isn’t an option. You can change how you feel by only using positive thinking skills. Sure, the electric bill was $200 more than you budgeted for the month. However, you should be thankful that you even have electricity.

In some third world countries, the electricity comes and goes. You have heat to keep you warm and air conditioning to keep you cool. Those in such nations would love to have the pleasure of a comfortable home with an HVAC system.

When you change your mindset from negative to positive, you will see a world of difference in your overall wellbeing. Feelings of gratitude and mindfulness enhance your mental strength. Look at each situation you face daily, and though bad it may seem, you should try to find something positive.

Remember that some of the worst storms end with a rainbow. When the skies begin to clear, and the sun’s rays hit the water droplets, it displays one of the most beautiful sights in nature. Stay positive and focused no matter what life throws your way.

Final Thoughts on Gathering Up Your Mental Strength to Face Tough Times

It seems like the world is in chaos, and people struggle to find harmony in their lives. How do you combat the pressures of the world without losing your cool? The ten tips above can help you to protect your mental strength in times of adversity, and you should utilize as many as possible.

One of the most potent inspirational stories comes from the man who wrote the song “It Is Well with My Soul.” Horatio Spafford was someone who struggled and came through insurmountable troubles in life. He lost his business and his 4-year old son in the fires of Chicago in 1871.

Spafford struggled along until 1873 when even greater financial struggles hit his company. He decided to take a trip with his family on the SS Ville du Havre ship. A last-minute change of plans caused him to send his family ahead, and he would follow later.

Sadly, the ship collided with the Loch Earn in the Atlantic Ocean, and all four of his daughters perished. Anna, his wife, survived the incident, and she sent him a telegram to let him know she was alive. He immediately went to be with her. As the ship entered the area where his daughters had perished, he wrote the famous song.

Like Spafford, you can learn to sing even when things look their worst. This man lost everything he had and suffered more problems in his life than anyone could imagine. Yet, in the middle of the darkest of nights, he found a song in his heart. Is your mental strength like Spafford’s?

Have you ever wondered exactly why you remember all the mean things people have said to you more than the beautiful things they’ve said to you? That’s because your brain is hard-wired to remember negative experiences in life. And this sets you up for a negative mindset to gain a stronghold in your thoughts and actions. It can affect your friendships, your work, and your decisions. If you struggle with being overly negative, it’s crucial to find ways to let it go, especially of the more destructive types of negativity.

Here are the ten types of negativity you need to get rid of right now

Release the burden of these negative thoughts–you’ll be all the happier for it in the long run!

1. Blameshifting

Blameshifting is blaming others or situations for your own failure.  Studies say blameshifting is a tool people use to push away criticism. But the same study found that blameshifting usually backfires because people don’t like blame shifters. Think here of politicians who make sweeping campaign promises, then blame others when the commitments aren’t met, even though it’s their fault. Blaming your spouse, kids, or your upbringing is a form of negativity that weighs you down and distorts your view of life.

How to let go:

The next time you’re tempted to blame someone or something, stop and make a decision not to blameshift. Allow yourself to accept the situation and admit your own fault when needed. Find peace in letting go of this negative attitude.

2. Being a perfectionist

If you are a perfectionist, then you want to do things in an utterly perfect way. You set high standards for yourself and others. No one is perfect, and to set your goals on perfectionism is unrealistic. It’s a negative view of yourself because you’re afraid you won’t be accepted by others if you don’t look and act correctly.

How to let go:

Perfectionism is a deep-set negative view of yourself. Here are some simple new habits you can try to begin breaking free from perfectionism.

• Admit your weakness to others
• Don’t compete with other people, decide not to compete
• Accept yourself
• Practice gratitude for who you are
• Pray when you’re tempted to be critical of yourself or others
• Use mindfulness to relax and find peace

3. Self-defeating thoughts

Negative, self-defeating thoughts are those negative thoughts you believe about yourself. These thoughts chip away at your confidence. They bombard your mind with statements like

• I can’t do it, why bother trying?
• I always mess things up. I’ll mess this up too.
• I’m not good enough.
• I’m a hopeless mess.
• I’ll probably fail as I’ve done before.

When you have self-defeating thoughts, you become your own worst enemy. If you had a friend that uttered these things to you, you would question the friendship. So, don’t talk to yourself with these negative thoughts.

How to let it go:

Please pay attention to your thoughts when they cross your mind. Review what caused you to think like this, then make a choice to let go of them. Here are some additional items you can try to help reverse your self-defeating thoughts.

• Ask yourself why you’re thinking this way.
• Change your negative thoughts with positive ones. Instead of “I can’t do it, why bother” say, “I can always try.”
• Talk to yourself, don’t listen to yourself. Tell yourself what’s real instead of listening to lies.

4. Judging others

Judging others is a form of negativity because it’s an effort to feel better about yourself at the expense of others. Being critical of others, seeing their faults, and assuming you’d never be like that shows your own insecurities. It would help if you felt better than others because of your uncertainties. Judging shifts the focus off of your faults so you can find fault in others. This negativity destroys your relationships. It kills your self-esteem and your ability to see yourself correctly.

How to let go:

• Refuse to judge others. Assume you don’t know people’s story so you shouldn’t come to a conclusion.
• Choose to understand the other person’s situation.
• Be accepting of others. No one is perfect, so don’t judge people by those criteria.
• Choose to love others and love yourself.

5. Fear of failing

No one wants to fail, but if you have a fear of failure, it paralyzes you. Fear of failure keeps you in from reaching out at work, in relationships, and in every part of your life. Fear of failure blinds you to your true potential. This negative mindset holds you back from really living.

How to let go:

• It’s easy to get overwhelmed, so set small, reachable goals for yourself. Accomplishing small goals leads to achieving bigger goals.
• Make a list of your failure fears. Figure out what will happen if you fail. You may be surprised to see that failure isn’t the worst thing.
• Others have failed big time only to bounce back and succeed. Tell yourself you can bounce back. You can overcome any failures.
• Don’t believe everything you think. Just because you think it, doesn’t make it real. Your fear of failure is a lie you are telling yourself. Please do not believe it.

6. Low expectations in life

Another common type of negativity that can hold you back has low expectations. You assume the worst about yourself and your life. You feel like your life is worse than everybody else’s life. Low expectations are related to fear of failure because you feel like you will never succeed. This thinking may be related to your poor choices, but not always. It’s a mindset that develops over time as you allow negative thoughts to fill your mind. You begin to believe the lies.

How to let it go:

View your life as a journey. Choose to be healthy, happy, and empowered along the route. Try some practical things to help improve your perspective.

• Mindfulness breaks to bring calm and peace into your life.
• Exercise releases endorphins, so you feel better physically and mentally.
• Gratitude journaling can help you be grateful for what you have.
• Find a community of like-minded people to can share life.

7. Worrying

Worry is when you feel uneasy or concerned about something. Your brain goes into overdrive, thinking about all the bad things that could happen. Worry eats away at you. It distorts what’s real and creates anxiety and fear. It’s a negative mindset that causes stress, which makes you prone to physical problems such as ulcers, high blood pressure, and heart disease.

How to let it go:

Here are a few ways to stop worrying.

• Try to live more in the present instead of the future “what ifs.”
• When you start to feel that worry, stop yourself and let it go.
• Avoid things that trigger your stress like news or social media.
• Keep a journal of your worries. When they’re on paper, they don’t look so bad.

8. Helplessness

Helplessness is a feeling that everything is overwhelming. You underestimate your ability to rise up and face challenges, to do hard things. You avoid difficulties, and anything hard you ask for help. This low confidence makes you clingy and insecure. You look to alcohol or overeating to calm yourself. Helplessness is negative thinking about you.

How to let go:

Letting go of helplessness means taking a small step outside your fears. Choose to stop being helpless. When you have a challenge, see it as an opportunity to succeed. Other ways to overcome helplessness include

• Set small goals
• Keep a gratitude journal.
• Find a community
• Push your helpless thoughts away and replace them with positive thoughts about yourself.

9. Trying to control

Controlling people try to control their spouses, kids, friends, and sometimes even strangers. This type of negativity is based on anxiety and fear of losing control. You may feel if you don’t try to control things, something terrible could happen. It’s a skewed view of your own abilities.

Common controlling techniques include

• Being critical of others
• Wanting to prevent bad things from happening to others or yourself
• Finding fault in others
• Keeping a record of wrongs people have done to you
• Manipulating others out of fear of losing control

How to let go:

If you find yourself drifting into a controlling attitude, stop yourself. Tell yourself it’s okay not to control everything. Refuse to control others. Accept others as they are.

10. Jealousy

Jealousy is a feeling of insecurity that leads you to crave what others have. You may wish you had their looks or wealth or career or children or spouse. Jealousy leads to anger, resentment, and disgust. It’s a deep hole that you fall into when you nurture negative feelings about yourself and others.

How to let it go:

Refuse to fall into the jealousy trap. Find contentment in your own life. Cultivate gratefulness. Don’t compare yourself to others, instead appreciate the differences.

Final thoughts on releasing all forms of negativity from your life

Negativity comes in all forms of behavior and attitudes. It disguises itself in worry and fear of failure. It obscures your view of who you are and makes you focus on what’s not right in your life instead of what’s good.  If you find negativity holding you back from living your life, stop it in its tracks. Refuse to give in thoughts of jealousy, control, or worry. Do the hard work it takes to step away from being a negative person into a life of positivity.